another downer

Another day, a down day. I'm once again under the influence of the black dog. These swings are exhausting, one minute up, then down, then side to side, this roller coaster ner ends.
I'm tired of it, I just want it to stop, I want to sleep
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Im back in the bin again, there goes my 6 month 'bullet proof' plan.
I was feeling really bad yesterday and today is like I am another person, now i really think i am going nuts!

two words

If Only...

new home

I'm still kind of homeless even though I'm paying rent, my current dwelling is nice and my flatmates are lovely people, we a happy family...
I miss having my own place and having all my stuff, I miss my bed and having the freedom of coming and going when I please without having to give accounts of my where abouts, living alone suits me better but for the time being I will have to stay put where I am and wait until I find affordable accommodation on my own.

I might start looking for a job and hopefully I will be able to work 2 days a week and 1 day volunteering at the school, I love my gardening days.

I am still very brittle

time

Time is critical, I only have 5b minutes to write something meaningful but my brain is frozen...
miss ..... a lot today

great day

Despite the rain I had an awesome day at work, love gardening.

2 weeks ago

Back in my home town for a while now, I reckon I arrived about 2 weeks ago. Now the whole battle with bureaucracy has begun. Already landed a volunteering job, it will be awesome! Not quite as high as I was when I just came back, now I feel like I'm on the level but if I'm not careful it will all just come on top of me and I can go down very quickly. I want a hug.
I'm very sleepy, the insomnia is coming back but I feel so tired, i just want to fall asleep for a couple of days.
Good luck to me! - there's no chance that is going to happen...